Archive for April, 2013

DI KASIH BERAPA?

April 29, 2013

Pertanyaan di atas diungkapkan pada saya oleh istri saya, setelah saya memberi uang pada seorang nenek dan cucunya dipinggir jalan malam itu. Itu adalah uang kembalian dari kami makan malam bersama, sebenarnya cuma sekedar ngasih aja, nggak terpikir kalau istri saya sampai memikirkan sebegitu dalam tentang memberi uang itu.

Memang pada dasarnya dia seorang yang sangat dengan cepat tersentuh hatinya dengan belas kasihan, dan nggak tanggung-tanggung untuk ngasih orang tanpa kadang memikirkan dulu kira-kira mesti dikasih enggak sih. Nah, pernyataan terakhir itu yang sering datang di otak saya. Sementara perasaan istri saya kadang lebih dulu menguasai. Namun beda ceritanya, bila kita memang di gerakkan dalam hati untuk memberi tanpa bertanya lagi apa alasannya, mengapa dia dan seterusnya.

Perkara sederhana itu nggak sesederhana saat kita melakukannya, pemberian itu juga bisa jadi menjadi ukuran seberapa besar hati kita mempunyai kapasitas bersyukur. Karena bila kita sudah penuh dengan ucapan syukur, tentunya tidak ada lagi kekuatiran untuk kekurangan, sedamgkan kekurangan timbul dari ketidakpenuhan hati dan pikiran kita terhadap penguasaan sesuatu yang ada dalam hidup kita.

Saya belajar dengan hal sederhana ini, bahwa kemampuan memberi benar adanya bukan berdasar berapa banyak yang kita punya, namun dari seberapa besar hati kita merespon panggilan memberi itu sendiri.

inspiration

April 25, 2013

150213/ Tukang Gorengan

April 18, 2013

Tanpa sengaja kami mengobrol, dari sekedar menawarkan dagangannya malah jadi perbincangan menunggu bus berangkat. Matanya tak lagi normal, untuk membaca sudah mulai kabur, bahkan kadang mesti minta bantuan orang. Ceritanya, tahun 1999 dia mengalami trauma hingga bisa dikatakan “menangis tanpa air mata” , entah apa yang sebenarnya terjadi tidak dia ceritakan.
Untuk memeriksakan matanya saja dia tidak mampu, apalgi untuk membeli kacamata. Hingga sekarang, meskipun setiap sore dia mulai kabur pandangannya, tetap saja dia mengumpulkan rupiah untuk menghidupi keluarganya.

Dan…saya menutup perbincangan dengan empat ribu rupiah untuk enam buah gorengan dalam kantong kertas bekas pembungkusnya. Rasanya lebih terasa enak…meski sudah tak lagi hangat.

25 PILIHAN YANG MENUNTUN PADA KEBAHAGIAAN

April 18, 2013

Memperingati atas kehilangan anaknya yang ke 25 tahun, Nancy menuliskan resepnya untuk menolong diri sendiri dan orang lain untuk lebih menikmati hidup dalam kebahagiaan.

Berikut adalah apa yang dia bagikan : “Dan tolong menambah atau mengganti apa yang bergema untuk ANDA tentang pilihan yang Anda buat yang mengarah pada kebahagiaan Anda, serta bagi orang di sekitar Anda!”

1. Memaafkan diri sendiri … untuk menjadi lembut untuk hati dan Roh.
2. TERSENYUM …. sering.
3. Dapatkan TIDUR yang baik setiap malam.
4. Makan sehat. Berbelanja secara Royal berkala!
5. Menjaga tubuh Anda fit dan lincah.
6. Bersikap baik kepada orang asing yang Anda temui.
7. Ekspresikan TERIMA KASIH … terus …. atas berkat-Mu.
8. Doa. Jika Anda merasa Allah jauh, itu bukan Tuhan yang pindah.
9. Meditasi. Yang dihasilkan keheningan adalah portal untuk mencapai kedamaian batin Anda dan menghubungkan ke Semesta, sumber kemungkinan tak terbatas.
10. Dengarkan suara HATI anda.
11. Ganti pikiran negatif dengan pikiran positif …. atau dengan ungkapan rasa syukur untuk hal-hal besar dan kecil.
12. Ketika seseorang berarti bagi Anda atau menyebabkan Anda stres, menembak kembali pada mereka dengan cinta sebagai amunisi Anda … diam-diam atau keras. Kedengarannya mustahil? Cobalah. Sukses datang dengan praktek dan komitmen untuk mengatasi kemarahan dan harapan.
13. MEMILIKI IMAN!
14. Melihat tantangan sebagai kesempatan untuk belajar dan tumbuh.
15. Terima saat seperti itu.
16. Visi apa yang ingin Anda lihat dalam hidup Anda daripada berfokus pada apa yang Anda ingin pergi. Pikiran Anda memiliki energi dan menarik lebih dari apa yang Anda pikirkan.
17. Mintalah BANTUAN ketika Anda membutuhkannya. Kita tidak bisa berfungsi sendirian di dunia ini.
18. Memberikan uang kepada orang yang membutuhkan, tanpa menghakimi.
19. Lakukan hal-hal yang menyenangkan … teratur. Main-main!
20. Memiliki dan merawat setidaknya satu tanaman di rumah Anda.
21. Dengarkan suara hati Anda, salah satu yang mengatakan, “Jangan katakan itu padanya / padanya.” Atau, “Aku harus pergi tidur sekarang, aku lelah!”
22. Secara lisan memberitahu orang yang Anda cintai bahwa Anda mencintai mereka.
23. Mengambil istirahat dari teknologi. Untuk hari minggu atau selama beberapa jam setiap hari …. tidak termasuk ketika Anda sedang tidur. Dan mematikan perangkat Anda setidaknya satu jam sebelum tidur. (Saran dari The Ambassador Tidur ®)
24. Lihatlah di cermin dan berkata, “I LOVE YOU” 100 kali setiap hari. Bila Anda melampaui percaya ini MENGETAHUI itu, mengurangi jumlah pengulangan. Jika Anda sudah ada, Anda paling beruntung!
25. Tambahkan pilihan Anda sendiri untuk daftar, apa pun yang mengarah ke kebahagiaan ANDA!

Semoga Anda berkelimpahan kebahagiaan!

SUMBER:

http://www.helpothers.org,

http://navigatewithnancy.blogspot.com/

GRATEFUL

April 14, 2013

“Write it on your heart that every day is the best day in the year.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

031212/Om Yang Baik

April 12, 2013

Ternyata masih ada yang baik dan peduli di kereta eksekutif Gajayana yang kami tumpangi malam ini. Pada awal pemesanan tiket, istri saya minta tempat duduk yang berdampingan supaya bisa duduk berjajar dengan anak saya, ternyata nomer itu tidak berdampingan alias besisih-sisihan, hanya bejajar saja dan dipisahkan oleh jalan ditengah dan saya dapat nomer kursi didepannya.

Di awal perjalanan, sengaja si mami dan abby duduk berdampingan sambil menyuapi abby makan, namun ketika sampai stasiun tugu Jogja, ada penumpang yang banyak masuk dan mengambil bagian tempat duduknya masing-masing. Mami dan abby harus pindah ketempat duduk yang telah ditentukan. Saya berusaha meminta dengan baik, boleh nggak pak tuker tempat buat anak dan istri saya, bapak yang berpenampilan rapi dan trendy mirip pejabat ini dengan ketus dan angkuh menjawab,”sama-sama saya juga bawa isteri pak.”. Alias tidak boleh.

Maksud saya sederhana saja kok, kalo memang masih bisa dinegoisasikan untuk berpindah tempat duduk, kenapa tidak? Ternyata memang tidak bisa. Untung si abby tetap ceria dan sambil bermain “geser-geser” dia tidak peduli dengan kejadian yang barusan terjadi. Lalu dilanjutkan menyanyi disela-sela kursi dan seterusnya saya pangku sampai akhirnya mulai mengantuk. Akhirnya, maminya menidurkannya dengan posisi duduk diatas pangkuannya. Setelah tertidur pulas, barulah ia dipindahkan duduk sendiri.

Bersyukur, sampai di cirebon, si om yang duduk disamping mami bangun. Saat kereta berhenti sebentar, ia keluar untuk merokok, dipikir si mamai, si om ini turun dan ketinggalan charger dan topinya. Lalu saya susulkan barangnya tersebut, ternyata…memang belum turun. Dan setelah masuk lagi ke gerbong, dia menawarkan untuk berpindah, supaya abby dan maminya bisa satu baris duduknya. Senangnya si abby, sambil teriak..”Papi, lihat…ada temenya keleta disamping itu, wow…”. (Nggumun, alias kagum karena ini adalah pertama kalinya ia naik kereta 🙂 )

Senang, karena masih ada orang baik dan pengertian. Dan senang karena dia menabur keindahan meskipun tampaknya sederhana, namun itu berarti.

Tidak mudah, dan tidak banyak orang mengerti kebutuhan orang lain dan rela untuk berbagia atau menolong orang lain. Dan itu menjadikan sebuah ujian untuk menerapkan kepedulian antar sesama yang sejati.

11 Life-Changing Questions You Must Ask Yourself

April 10, 2013

Ask yourself these questions every day. Without fail. And then, based on your answers, take action.

man looking in the mirror

Keep this list handy. Ask yourself these questions every day–without fail. And then, based on your answers, take action.

1. Who would cry the most at my funeral?

Those are people who love you unconditionally. Start returning the feeling.

2. Do I spend enough time with the people who would cry the most at my funeral?

Probably not. Even though those are the people who see the good in you, and make you feel good about yourself.

3. Who would I want to cry the most at my funeral?

Chances are those are the people you neglect the most. You care about them but you’re taking them for granted.

Stop taking them for granted.

4. Am I proud to tell people where I work?

If not, it’s time to start looking elsewhere. Titles come and go. Money comes and goes. Pride is forever.

5. Is my company a business I would want my children to run?

There may be aspects of your business you wouldn’t wish on your worst enemy, much less your kids: insufferable customers, unbearable employees, difficult working conditions, uncertain long-term prospects.

If you would say to your child, “No, I wouldn’t want you to have to deal with that…” why do allow yourself to continue to deal with that?

Naturally you want your kids to be happy. You also deserve to be happy. List the problems, then fix the problems.

If you want a better future for your kids, show them the way by making a better future for yourself.

6. Does today feel different than yesterday?

It should, if only in a very small way. Otherwise you’re sitting still.

7. Do I say “no” more than I say “yes”?

“No” ensures today will be exactly the same as yesterday. Or maybe worse.

F that.

8. Do I spend money instead of time?

Maybe you buy your kids “stuff” because you feel guilty for being away so much, or missing events, or being distracted most of the time. Maybe you buy your significant other “stuff” when you feel guilty about not paying enough attention or showing, by word and action, that you care.

Or maybe you spend money on productivity tools instead of putting in the time to change inefficient work habits. Or maybe you buy expensive fitness equipment and trendy workout gear instead of just sucking it up and working out more.

Money never produces the same results as time. Expensive clothes can’t get you in shape; productivity apps can’t make you more efficient; a new tablet can’t transform your business life.

Money can change some things, temporarily. Time can change anything, forever.

And don’t forget: Your kids will soon forget the video game you bought them but they’ll never forget the afternoon you spent together.

9. Do I think of myself as a noun?

“I’m an inventor.” “I’m a speaker.” “I’m a writer.”

You’re in a box.

Start defining yourself as a noun and you start to feel like you’ve arrived (even when you haven’t). Slowly your focus shifts to “being” rather than doing, to maintaining a sense of self rather than striving to continually improve specific skills.

And you slowly close yourself off to other activities, other ventures, and other possibilities.

Don’t define yourself by what you do. Never let yourself be a noun. Be a person who does lots of verbs–and is always open to more.

10. Do I make people feel good about themselves?

Unexpected praise, like the gift given “just because,” makes a huge impact.

Every day, people around you do good things. Praise at least one of them, sincerely and specifically. They’ll feel great. You’ll feel great.

11. Do I scare myself?

If not, you should.

Don’t scare yourself with fear of the future, or the economy, or injury or death, but with things you decide to do that push, stretch, challenge, and leave you excited and thrilled and relieved in an “Oh my gosh I can’t believe I did that!” way.

We all have fears. What matters is what we do when we’re hesitant or nervous or afraid. When we turn away, we die a little inside; when we face a fear and do what we really want to do, we feel truly alive.

Are you living… or really living?

You only get one chance. Make sure you live.

Jeff Haden learned much of what he knows about business and technology as he worked his way up in the manufacturing industry. Everything else he picks up from ghostwriting books for some of the smartest leaders he knows in business. @jeff_haden

ENCOURAGEMENT

April 4, 2013

“Worry weighs a person down; an encouraging word cheers a person up” (Proverbs 12:25, NLT)

Success: What it isn’t

April 2, 2013

By John C Maxwell

The problem for most people who want to be successful is not that they can’t do it. The main obstacle for them is that they misunderstand success. Maltbie D. Babcock said, “One of the most common mistakes and one of the costliest is thinking that success is due to some genius, some magic, something or other which we do not possess.”

If that’s not right, then what DOES it mean to be a success? What does it look like? First, let’s talk about what it DOESN’T look like:

Many of us have a wrong picture of success. Frankly, the majority of people misunderstand it. They wrongly equate it with achievement of some sort, with arriving at a destination or attaining a goal. Here are several of the most common misconceptions about success:

1. Wealth: Probably the most common misunderstanding about success is that it’s the same as having money. A lot of people believe that if they accumulate wealth, they’ll be successful. But wealth does not bring contentment – or success.

Industrialist John D. Rockefeller, a man so rich that he gave away over $350 million in his lifetime, was once asked how much money it would take to satisfy him. His reply: “Just a little bit more.” King Solomon of ancient Israel, said to be not only the wisest but also the richest man who ever lived, said, “Whoever loves money never has money enough; whoever loves wealth is never satisfied with his income.”

Even Greek millionaire Aristotle Onassis recognized that money isn’t the same as success. He said, “After you reach a certain point, money becomes unimportant. What matters is success.”

2. A Special Feeling. Another common misconception is that people have achieved success when they feel successful or happy. But trying to feel successful is probably even more difficult than trying to become wealthy.

The continual search for happiness is one of the main reasons that so many people are miserable. If you make happiness your goal, you are almost certainly destined to fail. You will be on a continual roller coaster, changing from “successful” to “unsuccessful” with every mood change. Life is uncertain, and emotions aren’t stable. Happiness simply cannot be relied upon as a measure of success.

3. Possessing Something Specific and Worthwhile. Think back to when you were a kid. Chances are that there was a time when you wanted something really bad, and you believed that if you possessed that thing, it would make a significant difference in your life. When I was nine years old, it was a red and silver Schwinn bicycle. Back then, the thing to do in our neighborhood was to race around on our bikes.

But I was riding an old hand-me-down bicycle, and I had trouble keeping up with the kids on newer bikes. But I figured that if I had that new Schwinn bike, I’d have it made. I’d have the newest, fastest, best-looking bike among all my friends, and I’d make them all eat my dust.

On Christmas morning, I got my wish. And for a while it was great. I loved that bike, and I spent a lot of time riding it. But I eventually discovered that it didn’t bring me the success or long-term contentment that I’d hoped for and expected.

That process has repeated itself in my life. Over the years, I found that success didn’t come as the result of possessing something I’d wanted. Possessions are at best a temporary fix. Success cannot be attained or measured that way.

4.  Power. Charles McElroy once joked, “Power is usually recognized as an excellent short-term anti-depressant.” There’s a lot of truth to that statement, because power often gives the appearance of success, but even then, it’s only temporary.

You’ve probably heard before the quote from English historian, Lord Acton: “Power tends to corrupt and absolute power corrupts absolutely.” Abraham Lincoln echoed that belief when he said, “Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man’s character, give him power.” Power really is a test of character. In the hands of a person of integrity, it is of great benefit; in the hands of a tyrant, it causes terrible destruction. By itself, power is neither positive or negative. Nor is it the source of security or success. Besides, all dictators eventually lose power – even benevolent ones.

5.  Achievement. Many people have what I call “destination disease.” They believe that if they can arrive somewhere – attain a position, accomplish a goal, or have a relationship with the right person – they will be successful. At one time, I had a similar view of success: I defined it as the progressive realization of a predetermined worthwhile goal. But over time I realized that definition fell short of the mark.

Simply achieving goals doesn’t guarantee success or contentment. Look at what happened with Michael Jordan. In 1993, he decided to retire from basketball, saying that he had accomplished all the goals he had wanted to achieve. And then he went on to play baseball in the minor leagues – but not for long. He couldn’t stay away from the game of basketball. He played again from 1995 to 1999. Then he retired again – for a couple seasons. He played his final seasons 2001-2003. Playing the game was the thing. Being in the midst of the process. You see, success isn’t a list of goals to be checked off one after another. It’s not reaching a destination. Success is a journey.

From Your Road Map for Success